Life as I know it (Art)

If it doesn’t come bursting out of you in spite of everything, don’t do it.Unless it comes unasked out of your heart and your mind and your mouth and your gut, don’t do it.
If you’re doing it for money or fame, don’t do it.
If you’re doing it because you want women in your bed,
 don’t do it.If it’s hard work just thinking about doing it,
 don’t do it.If you have to wait for it to roar out of you, 
then wait patiently.If it never does roar out of you,
 do something else.

Unless it comes out of your soul like a rocket, unless being still would drive you to madness or suicide or murder, don’t do it.Unless the sun inside you is burning your gut, don’t do it.When it is truly time,
 and if you have been chosen, It will do it by itself and it will keep on doing it until you die or it dies in you.There is no other way.

And there never was.Charles Bukowski.         

   

     For someone those words have no common with  the name of post, but for me it has, although I know that Bukowski meant art, something that you create...But isn't you life also your creation?!Aren't you the one who has the brushes and paint?!The one who is standing in front of a white canvas?! Some people are going to say "Maybe you can control your life,but there are people who cannot do it, not because they don't want, but because there are things which control them..."And well I might also tell you that in everyone's life there may be things  which one did not choose, things which you can't change, and that's the frame of your canvas, no matter if you like it or not everyone has that frame, you can't draw past it, but you have whole canvas inside, although many of us forget it, they try to prove that they can do anything and that they can draw past this frame, which is unnecessary as long as your canvas is still white.Some people have it worse, they have a frame and spotted canvas, so they give up on whole painting just because of few spots.
    what I'm trying to say is that you may have different circumstances, but don't forget that you are the one who has brushes and paint.Why not make your spots an addition to your painting?! Or cover them?! you would still know that spots are there, underneath, but they don't ruin your painting.Oh and frame! Now tell me, when you go to gallery what do you look at? at painting or at frame?! you may like frame or you may not like it, but you know it has nothing to do with the artist.
     And here comes the definition. People who love their life just paint on their canvas, no matter what others say they paint what they want, it comes roaring out of them, and they don't try to stop it.But some people are afraid, they start to look at other canvases and think they can never do better, so why even try? they think their abilities are not enough, they start to complain about frame, or spots, and it continues until someone will just lead their hand and make them draw something they didn't want to draw, and they start to blame that person...But a simple life lesson which art taught me is: when you have a canvas, brushes and paint just let your heart make decision and paint whatever comes roaring from inside of you, it doesn't matter if someone is better, just do your best and don't be afraid of making mistakes, they can be covered, and i swear that when you're done you'll be proud of yourself, and you'll love it.You will love both, the process and the result.
                                                                                                   Love always,
            Sally.

here are two of my drawings to let you know where this post comes from...

This drawing was inspired by Ed Sheeran's music, it's one of my favorites. 

"13 reasons why" I started to write Poetry...

"A poem begins as a lump in the throat, a sense of wrong, a homesickness, a lovesickness" (or a society sickness) -Robert Frost 

  So today I'm here to reveal what was the turning point, which made me write poetry...Some of you know (I mean my friends) and some of you guess that I started to write poetry. I'm gonna say it right now that I'm not going to publish any poems except one, here or anywhere else, just not yet.
 So it all started one Monday when I had to study physics, (let my physics teacher and all the rest who love physics forgive me) I hate physics, or better say I hate when I have to stupidly study something by heart,  the worst is that no one ever explains why the hell I should know all that stuff and how I can use it....So feeling as stupid and as down as possible I was just scratching something in my notebook when the idea of writing, first visited me and I wrote :   

“What if I am a dreamer? 
The one you’ve never known. 
You think I’m not unusual, 
But what if you are wrong?! 
You say I’m not talanted, 
But what if you cant see 
The way I am talanted 
In something you can’t be 
And maybe I am usual, 
And maybe I am wrong, 
But still I am a Dreamer. 

The one you’ve never known                                                                                                                                                             So this was first piece of poetry I have ever written, there was nothing I changed or...I don't know this is how it came out , and then when I finished it and re-read it I liked it very much, too much even maybe, and I decided to write something else, just to try if it was a one time thing or I can really write, so I wrote second one the same evening few minutes after first, and the first person with whom I shared my first poem was my English teacher Oksana, whom I immediately texted it and she liked it very much, and on the next day I had her lesson and she read second one too and she asked why did it happen, like, what inspired me maybe, and for that time I had no answer, so I just explained it was a way not to study Physics, since that she calls my poetry physics, which I explain as physics of ones soul maybe....So after over-thinking I finally remembered that before that Monday evening I read some pieces of poetry on tumblr and it all started from reading a book by Jay Asher " Thirteen reasons why" If you read it you should know that Hannah (a girl from a book) wrote poetry and there is this part :

 "Then without even trying, I memorized the very first poem in that book. And no matter how hard I try, I can’t seem to shake it from my head even today. So here it is, for your appreciation …or amusement" and there was poem, I even made a drawing for it, in case you can't read it, it says :

"If my love were an ocean,
there would be no more land.
If my love were a desert,
you would see only sand.
If my love were a star-
late at night, only light.
And if my love could grow wings,
I'd be soaring in flight. "

So just like Hannah says, this "poem from Monet's" just stuck in my head, and I still think it is one of the best poems I ever read in English, because most of poems I've read have no rhythm, which I'm so desperately searching for, and I think I got pretty good in it...
  To finish this post somehow...I'll tell you that for me poetry became a new way of self expression, before, I was drawing and showing people something through colors, but now I can make them feel the same thing I'm feeling, and make them think about same things, so my new "goal" kind of is to collect those poems and publish them! to be honest it sounds silly a bit "Sally, now as a poet...." I don't know to be honest I just want to give it a try, maybe because I really enjoy doing this....And partly because I feel that there are many things I can talk about. Here are two other poems I like, I have even written them in my diary.

                                                  Love Always,
                                                       Sally.